How i came up with my decision to serve a full-time mission!

Ladies and gents, Lemme tell y’all my story of how i ended up hitting the submit button. —> going on a mission.

My  journey to decide to serve a mission was a challenge for me. It was a long process. I was not stunned by the change of age announcement last October 2012 conference, because  I was not yet ready and sure.

If i could remember it exactly, At 17, I listed some of my big plans for my future. First on the list was to finish my studies . Second, to have a good job. Third, GO ON A MISSION. Fourth, temple marriage. I posted it at the ceiling so that it would be the first thing I see every morning each time I wake up.

March 2012, I graduated from college, I finished Bachelor  of Science in Business administration major in Financial Management I was really happy because I put all my effort to finished it. And now, it’s already done.

DSC01145
My crazy friends. I’ll never forget these gurls who makes my college life so amazing.
Copy of IMG_0156
I fought a good fight, I have finished the course and have kept the faith.

Two months after I graduated, I got a good job. While enjoying the pleasure of being a working girl, I meet some challenges, I became WORLDLY, I began to desire the vain things of the world, which is opposite from the standards and principles I’ve learned from the church. The mission thing disappeared in my mind. Satan is really trying hard to drag us to a misery life. And yes, I was tempted to do things which I thought I’ll be happy, but I’m wrong.

If someone  asked me if I will serve a mission, I would gladly say, “yes, I will”. But growing up has never been easy, there have been many changes in my life, which I can’t control.  From non-member boys to peer pressure at work, months of not magnifying my call as a ward missionary, not attending  singe adult activities, compromising my standards, not reading the scriptures for almost half a year, haven’t attended institute, I became spiritually inactive. I feel like I am far from Heavenly Father. My goal has changed, from serving a mission, in to going abroad because it has always been my dream.

I am not happy with my life at that point. I feel that there is something that I should do and I need to figure it out.

Then going on a mission has crossed my mind several times. and I just rejected it over and over again, thinking that young women are not obliged to go on  a mission.  I wanted to serve God but wasn’t sure if it’s through serving a full-time mission,  plus my desire had vanished. Knowing that I’ll have to leave my comfort zone, my family and friends. I became hesitant, I felt doubts and fears and worried about what’s gonna happen if I continue my plans of going on a mission. I’m struggling to get an answer for  year and a half since I graduated from college.  I tried to pray seriously about it and asked if I should go on a mission, I feel good after praying but I still don’t know the answer.

July 2013, I meet a wonderful guy, his name was Mark (name changed) he was a Returned missionary, I can feel the strong spirit when we dated.  We went to the temple and the most funny thing about this was when he asked me why  angel Moroni was chosen to be on the top of the temples and why was he carrying a trumpet and (shoot!), I dunno what in the world, was I’m actually doing that I can’t answer his question. So i feel ashamed about that, I feel like I am not worth to be with him. He has a strong testimony while I can’t even answer a simple question that a primary child could.  (Blaaahh!)-judge me.

So I made up my mind. I want to be like  Mark. I want to answer every question that he’ll be throwing, so I have to be prepared. (i know this is selfish, but I will never know if going on a mission is right for me) So, I’m starting to attend institute again and while I scanned my old institute notebook, I read a note saying, “a double minded man, is unstable man. I cleared up my mind and felt I needed to decide now. I have to choose between what’s right and wrong, after all there’s no such thing as grey areas. lol! it would mean choosing between temporal happiness or eternal happiness.

(It’s just funny sometimes that the Lord uses instruments to answer someones prayers.)

I prayed hard to my Heavenly father asking what should I do. I begun reading the scriptures and I learned to love it. I begun working with the missionaries and i feel happy preaching the gospel.

I will never ever forget that one Sabbath morning, I was inspired by a closing hymn which is played by my sister at sacrament. It was “The time is far spent”

The time is far spent; there is little remaining
To publish glad tidings by sea and by land.
Then hasten, ye heralds; go forward proclaiming:
Repent, for the kingdom of heaven’s at hand,
Be fixed in your purpose, for Satan will try you;
The weight of your calling he perfectly knows.
Your path may be thorny, but Jesus is nigh you;
His arm is sufficient, tho demons oppose.
This hymn really strikes me, it’s telling me that it’s time to serve the Lord. After almost 21 years of being blessed, I should share the knowledge of the gospel when and where I can, because If I didn’t do it, I would feel guilty for I have been so blessed and need to share it with other people. The gospel truly changes the lives for those who accepts it, it changes lives for the better.
And so, after much prayer and careful consideration, I’ve decided to serve God by serving a full-time mission. I am so grateful that I gained back my desire and that Heavenly Father doesn’t give up on me. I have never ever feel this happiness before. It’s different from the happiness i feel whenever I have a new dress, new shoes, or the joy after eating ice cream. I can’t explain this feeling. The plan of salvation is truly the Plan of Happiness.
If we put God first above all, everything will fall into right place. In God, everything will be alright just as what happened  when Peter saw Jesus Christ walks on the water. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and begins to sink. Jesus Christ reached out His hand and saved Peter. Then Jesus said, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?”  We should learn to trust God, no matter what the circumstances are.
I learn to trust God by putting my life on hold to serve HIM for 18 months, this is the least thing I can do compared to the sacrifices He made. I know Heavenly Father has something in store for me and that He has a better plan than I ever had. I know Jesus Christ lives and He loves us so much that he  died for our sins which makes us clean and worthy to return to our Heavenly Father’s presence. I know I am not perfect but He knows what my heart desires and He will makeup for where I lack.
i already hit the submit button. So excited.
i already hit the submit button. So excited.
So, I turned my papers on and just have to wait for stake president’s interview. My patience has been tested already, can’t wait to receive my mission call.
President Thomas S. Monson says, ” Whom the Lord Calls, the Lord Qualifies”.
 The Lord does not call those who are qualified but he qualifies those who are called! and He is hastening the work of salvation.
Can’t wait to tell my family and friends that I am going on a mission. I am so excited with my life and the future. Now is my time to serve the Lord for 18 months. I wish it would take so long.  Oh by the way! I’ll be turning 21, this September 21, 2013. cheers for that.!
Love Des ❤
Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s